New facebook Funny Status Ideas

Jake used to play sports. Then she realized you can buy trophies. Now she's good at everything.

Dave is color blind and trying to solve a rubiks cube... This could take a while...

Ricky dreams of a better world...where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned :0)

Dale says my computer just beat me at chess...but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Kate is cle'a]ni.ng he'r ke]yb29oa;rd

Dave is wondering why his daughter's diaper holds no where near the 22-37 pounds it promises.

Rob is proud of herself. She finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years.

Jane doesn't suffer from insanity... he enjoys every minute of it.

John ║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║█║▌│║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║ *ZAP* *BEEP* Price: $7.95

Shayne is wondering where noah kept woodpeckers on his ark

Love thinks that if your relationship status says, "It's complicated" that you should stop kidding yourself and change it to "Single"

Jane before you use the bathroom in someones house make sure you check they have toilet paper!!

Random Cool Facebook Status Tags

Newly Contributed facebook Status ideas. ENJOY!

1. taking a test in invisible ink... wait, the pen was out of ink.

2. This weekend drained all my energy. Good thing i generated more energy from the electric fence.

3. is currently not wearing any pants...

4. is wondering if you can grow marijuana on Farmville then sell it on Mafia Wars? is made with 10% real juice! is to sexy for this status! is [...]

5. After (M)onday n (T)uesday, even d week says WTF !!!

6. hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in my brain, because later you might think you’re having a good idea but it’s just eggs hatching.

7. Eating Bologna & Peanut Butter sandwiches. Don’t knock it till you try it.

8. If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.

9. So much to time, so little do.

10. You don’t drink, you don’t smoke… what do you do?